Another year

I turned 21 years old today and I've been thinking about the phrase "Happy Birthday" or as we say here in Norway "Gratulerer med dagen" (literal translation: congratulations on your day") and I am draw to question why you wish me a happy birthday, or congratulate me for that matter.

Because I didn't do anything. I didn't create me, I didn't birth me, nor do I decide my heartbeats or my breaths. That's all God. So when people congratulate me for living another year it facinates me because the only reason I am alive today is by the grace of God.

So instead of congratulating people on their birthday, maybe we should start praising God for them, thanking Him for them and continuously pray for them.

//pintrest

Psalm 139:13-18New International Version (NIV)

13 

For you created my inmost being;

    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

14 

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

    your works are wonderful,

    I know that full well.

15 

My frame was not hidden from you

    when I was made in the secret place,

    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

16 

Your eyes saw my unformed body;

    all the days ordained for me were written in your book

    before one of them came to be.

17 

How precious to me are your thoughts,[a] God!

    How vast is the sum of them!

18 

Were I to count them,

    they would outnumber the grains of sand—

    when I awake, I am still with you.

And also, today was made by the Lord, and that's why we should rejoice and be glad in it.

//pintrest (Psalm 118:24)

Happiness

To you.

I am currently sitting here doing my biology homework learning about caner cell and listening to worship music. The song that's on right now is "All you've ever wanted" by Casting Crowns and it's so good, and it makes me so emotional to know that all God ever wanted was my heart and after giving it to Him- I feel so much happiness that I nearly tear up just thinking about it. The Lord has blessed me so tremedously the last 6 months of my life because I let Him into my heart.

Here at UND I've met so many amazing people, I've become part of a Christian community and the Lord brings me such great joy through it. I've also found that my compassion for people have grown more than I ever thought possible, my heart aches for some of my closes friends that have drifted a bit away from the Lord because I know how much my life has changed for the better.

I always seeked my acceptance in guys and worldy things. I was never the partier or got into trouble. But I have had some seriously toxic relationships and I would idolize who I was dating. I became completly obsessed with them, and because I was so selfcouscious of myself and thought that I wasn't good enough, and even though they said they loved me I was convinced that they would find someone better, someone prettier. I may or may not have been cheated on, I don't know- some say yes, some say no- and that was such a blow to the heart.

I've always worn my heart on my sleeve, and I though that sex was equal to love, and all I wanted to feel was loved- so I lost my virginity at a very young age, because I was in love and I thought that was a good way to show it. Sex has been a big part of my life, and I thought that was what I was seeking to fulfill me.

What a lie. I mean, I liked it. But a lot of the time it would make me feel empty rather than happy, I was never satisfied and it made me so much more connected to the person I was dating which made it hard when the relationship came to an end. It broke me more than I could ever have imagined.

But then I came to know Jesus, and He restored my heart. I don't have that emptiness in my heart anymore, and I seek my happiness in Him, and I can promise you that I have never ever been this happy before. I was so emotinally broken, but He helped restored my heart and now I'm guarding my heart rather than giving it to the first guy that gives me some sort of positive attention.

I feel so happy and so fulfilled, because there is nothing I can do to make Him love me more, and there is nothing I can ever do to make Him love me less- what a blessing! He died for me. He died for us all- so that we could be with Him FOREVER, as long as we choose to believe in Him.
He suffered the most horrific death, crucifixion- for us. All of us! What an act of love!
Jesus has done everything for me and His love so perfect, nothing can compare to it!

Sure, I would love to get married someday- but I will not idolize my husband- and I'm gonna quote Brittney Moses here.

"To many women give men Jesus expectations. He can't heal your old wounds, he can't make you whole. Take your broken pieces to the cross. Healthy love realizes that people don't complete people. An imperfect person cannot make you whole. A spouse is a life partner, not a Saviour".

I took my broken pieces to the cross, to my Saviour. He healed me from my old wounds- he made me whole, and I cannot thank Him enough for that. There is only one Jesus, and your significant other is not Him.

I pray that you got something out of reading this, and I just want to tell you that you don't have to "clean up" before you seek Jesus. He wants you exactly as you are, He wants to help you through everything you go through, but you have to let Him.

From the bottom of my heart, I love you.

Singing for Jesus

So today, my stepdad made kind of a unkind comment that really got to me.
I was outside singing praises when I see that he and my mum is outside, which was fine.
But then he says "you don't sing very nice", that hurt my feelings. Not necessarily because I think my voice is great, but because I have quite a low self esteem from before, and it didn't really boost it.
Now, of course I don't want people to lie, but when it's something you love to do, then it hurts.
Being hurt by the comment, I pretended not to care and said "I don't sing for you", and it didn't really hit me until "One Way, Jesus" by Hillsong started playing.

I realized that of course I didn't sing for my stepdad, or anyone else for that matter. I sang for Jesus, and I don't think He cares whether or not my voice is pitch perfect. I think what matters to Him is that I spent time with Him and that I was praising Him. I was prioritizing Him instead of something else.

My mum came to talk to me 20 minutes later and said that I didn't have a bad singing voice, and that my stepdad had only said that because he heard me singing a song that I wasn't singing completly (meaning I probably stopped singing, then started, then mumbled or something). But I simply decided that, I wouldn't care.

Because now I know that I don't sing for anyone else. They can think I have the worst voice in the whole world, but it won't matter, because I'm singing for Jesus and not for them. And Jesus loves me no matter how bad I sing.

Why I Say Grace Before I Eat

Ever since I've become a Christian, I try to remember to say grace or sing before every meal. This has cause some of my family members to look at me a bit weirdly, so I thought I would share why I decided to start saying grace before I eat.

Ever since I was born, I've been taught to say "thank you for the food" to whoever made it and served it, and to this day, that is something I still do. So why is it so different, and why do people look at me weirdly when I start to pray or sing before I start eating? Technically, I've been doing what I've been taught all along: thank the someone that put food on the table for you to eat.

Now, of course, it's usually my parents that put the food on the table, so of course I thank them. But there wouldn't be very much to thank them for if God had not provided us with that food on beforehand.
He created this world, so He also created what I eat. And if I'm supposed to thank whoever put food on my table, it only makes sense to thank Him, because without Him- I wouldn't exist, nor would my parents, or the food I'm given.

So if you ever wonder why someone wants to pray or sing grace before they eat, it might be because they were taught to thank whoever put food on their table- which in all cases happens to be God.

I love God!

I am so thankful that I have God in my life, I have never felt the amount of love I do now, and that's His work! It feels so amazing to be in His love and feeling love, and spreading love.

Today my cousin was at our house and as kids we would fight as siblings, but as we have both grown up (he is 16, I think) we don't really fight anymore, but I still consider him a brother in many ways. I did not know that he would come, but I was really happy to see him, as it's been a while. And I remembered that he is going to start a school that doesn't have a very good reputation, and I also know that there has been rumors of drugs being there.

What's interesting that this popped into my mind is because at Youth Group we had a visit from a previous drug-user who spoke about how it was and why we should never ever try drugs and about how he used to be maybe the dangerous people in Norway, but was changed completely by Jesus! His testimony is amazing, but- on to the point. He has written a lot of books, one of them that's about drugs, and so I bought that one (and the rest of his books), but when I saw my cousin, who I really care about, I thought that he probably needs it more than me.

Now, don't get me wrong. I know he is smart, and that he probably wouldn't get into drugs, but I didn't want to risk anything because I know how bad peer pressure can be and because I know the reputation of his future school. So I asked if he liked reading, which he didn't really, but I said that I thought he might like the book and that it was about drugs. I also clarified that I don't think he would try drugs, but that if he is ever tempted then he has read the book and know what it will lead to.
This is not something I would've done before, because I didn't really have Christ that prominent in my life, but I am learning to put others before myself, and because I had heard the author speak about it, I already knew his story so I thought that my cousin would probably get more out of the book, if he decides to read it.

After I had given him the book, I decided I wanted to go to bed. So I gave my mum a hug, and told her I loved her (I do this every night though) and then I questioned if I should do the same to my cousin and my step-dad, and I decided that I would give them a hug and tell them I loved them to.
And it felt so good to do that!

Spreading love and showing that you love someone is an amazing feeling, and I encourage everyone to tell the people that you love that, well... You love them. It'll probably make their day better and make them feel loved and appriciated.

"Today is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it!" Psalm 118:24

Today is one of these days where I am rejoicing and being glad because of what the Lord has made.

Today I was blessed by getting to witness 4 teenagers from the church where I go get confimated.

The confirmants themselves played a big part in today's service, and it was so amazing to see. 

They had two small plays for us. 

One was about how you needed a "ticket" to get into Heaven, and that that "ticket" was Jesus Christ and having accepted Him into your life and as your savior, and that no matter how good you were (by your own and the worlds standard) you could not be let into Heaven without Jesus.

The second one was about being sad and feeling down, and not knowing why, and about how you should ask Jesus to be a part of your life and that you would feel better and that your life would change for the better by accepting Him, and inviting Him into your life.

They also talked about the fruits of the Spirit, which are, love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control (you can find this in Galathians 5:22-23). Some of the things they spoke about (they had made a tree, and put cutouts of fruit on it and written the words of the fruit of the Spirit on it, so creative!) were love and faithfulness, and each person said what that was to them, and when the girl that spoke about faithfulness she said something along the lines of "when I think of faithfulness I think of good friends, family and God. About someone who loves you no matter what and who never leaves you, even if you do something wrong" and my heart was filled with joy. The other confirmants also had really good things to say, but the faithfullness one really stuck with me.

I am so proud of them, they are such amazing people. I find so much joy in being around them, and I hope that with the time to come, they grow even closer to God. I pray that they seek Him all day, every day, because He will surely bless them.

The pastor also talked about the Good Shepherd and how Jesus wants to be your friend, and that nothing can separate you from His love.

So Thank You, God for blessing me with so much more than I deserve.

MemoryBox

Vilde: Yeah, people are behind you.
Me: What?!

I almost looked behind me, which is funny, because she wasn't talking about people standing physically behind me but behind me as in supporting me.